Nak balik kampung!!! :((

I've been off from work 4 days since Monday. Post-Nights la katakan..haha. Tak pernah rota so relaks sebegini. Dlm 3 bulan buat ITU ni, rasa mcm kerja 1.5 bulan je. No, don't be mistaken kanak2 yg nak jadi doktor. Jarang sekali kerja doktor akan serelaks sebegini. ITU kat hosp ni je camni

Masalah sekarang ialah malasnya...nak go back to work tomrrow!!!. Masalah ITU ni so specialize, semua orang at least pangkat trainee in a specialty. Aku ni baru 2nd year house-officer. Banyak gila tak tau. klu buat weekend / nights yg ada 3/4 org je on duty...mmg yr team-mates will grooaannn...cos they know u'll need a lot of support.

Okla complain sikit. This was what i wanted dulu2 masa junior HO. I tak tahan betul kerja on the ward. Jadi kuli over-worked, not appreciated, tak byk belajar pun. Dapat A&E and ITU byk senior support, but u r the most junior la....

Malas la layan omputih ni...
Dahla org slalu igt i belum habis belajar..taula muka aku ni sgt muda kan. Org igt i baru 18..Tqla...but i xla flattered sangat.

I tak tahan dah nak duk sini....please...7 tahun kat negara orang yg x best ni....limit yg dah di push and over-pushed!

I rasa i lagi ikhlas kerja kat Msia kot. Pesakit pun org sendiri. Bukanla omputih yg x appreciate and under-estimate org kita ni...

But i rasa i'm losing my empathy, sympathy, patience with clinical...probably losing them for good. Zaman sekarang ni, society's hard to please. Buat salah, x buat salah. pastu kena jaga hati patient, family, etc. other healthcare professionals pun hentam kita jugak. Kita pulak je yg kena maintain sabar, senyum je, be professional.

Also, there are a lot of grey areas in medicine ni. I don't like!

I like black&white, something i can do sincerely, and most importantly something yg will give me more time for my family. I rasa i dah spend too much time away from my family. And there's too much they have sacrificed for me to be here. I prefer something i can be independently successfull in, yg i minat...

WAAAHHHH!!!! (wailing out loud).....nak balik kampung!. Tak kesahla kampung nenek aku kat Johor ke kampung (rumah aku) kat Kelana Jaya ke...Dah tak tahan duk sini!!!

Nak balik!!!!